the truly terrible twos

I realize that there are terrible ones, terrible threes, terrible sevens, and terrible fifteens. For right now, let’s talk about terrible twos. Let’s talk about the true underbelly of parenting these emotionally charged, unregulated, very changeable little creatures. Sometimes it’s great, and we very stupidly blog about how mature and good-natured our toddlers are becoming. After we blog it, the wind is sure to blow in the other direction, and the little angels become wild beasts seemingly overnight.

(Also, yes, I don’t believe in labeling normal toddler behavior in a negative manner, but here I am anyway, just trying to have a venting moment.)

My little darling has completely lost her shit this week. She kicked off the bad mood with a massive temper tantrum Wednesday night, complete with flinging herself headfirst into the wall with such velocity I considered checking her pupils for signs of a concussion. I couldn’t have if I wanted to, though, because she was flailing and rolling on the floor, screaming like 10,000 demons straight from hell had decided to possess her little body. She passed out, panting and wheezing, only to wake up at 3 am and not go back to bed. I sent her off to school, stumbling like a little drunk person from exhaustion.

She’s gotten a wee better since then, and by that I mean the tantrums are smaller, and less severe. But she is still a very unhappy, miserable little girl. She demands something, only to refuse it in anger when I get it for her. If I give her the wrong cup or bottle or whatever, she freaks out and screams and cries like I just killed her puppy. Same for when I can’t guess exactly which object she wants, or won’t let her do things she knows she can’t, like climb up the bathroom cupboard, or the fireplace, or the piano, and get her little fingers on every button and wire and cord she can.

I picked her up from school and found her riding a little motorcycle toy thingy, crashing into the fence over and over. The teacher said she’d been crashing into the other kids, too, and it wasn’t funny (she was laughing like it was hilarious). The teacher ordered her to, “get off” the bike in a no-nonsense tone of voice, and much to my chagrin, she did it. Thank god I have teachers, and my mom, for one cannot do this by oneself!!!

And so, with my Eckhardt Tolle audiobook for back up, I am struggling to stay zen. That way there’s at least one calm presence in the household.

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Categories: parenting

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