no seriously, I’m done

I just sent out another round of emails to my grandma’s kids (and one niece). I’m trying to tell them: I can’t do this anymore. It’s out of control and I’m out! I’m not sure that they really get that? Or maybe they do and they just live too far away that they can’t or won’t do anything right now. Everyone is coming on Memorial Day. Until then… I dunno. This caregiver who is causing so much drama is insisting on meeting me and telling everyone I’m avoiding her. I’ve been in touch with her regarding my schedule, and she is welcome to meet with me when I’m home but she doesn’t want to do that because those are after her work hours. I told her she can call me and talk, or wait until Monday when I’m home while she’s there. Or Saturday, when I’m home all day. She doesn’t want to. She threatened to call my uncle and talk to him… which isn’t a threat at all ’cause I’m like oh yes please do that! I would love for him to take over so no problem there.

I had to tell her today, again, to go ahead and call him or we can talk on the phone. She just said, “ok” and that’s it. She wanted my mom to take M to school in the morning so I could meet with her. Except I can’t pick M up because I have an appointment, and I’d prefer to spend some time with my daughter and not pawn her off on my mom. I also need to take her to school to see if her teachers have any feedback, sign her up for the summer program, and pick up any announcements or newsletters. Sorry, but my kid comes first. And you know what? I think I’d like to come at least second to myself!

I go up there every day to see how grandma is and sit next to her. She complains nonstop and bitterly. She isn’t happy with me or anything else. It’s a miserable state of affairs let me tell you. No one is happy. I’m about to lose my mind being up there. Even a few minutes of it is just miserable. My poor mom keeps filling in for people at all hours, now she can barely look after M. It’s insane.

I never, ever want M to take care of me in my old age. Put me in a home, visit me once a week or whatever. Go out and live life and never get bogged down by this shit!

 

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Categories: elder care

5 Comments »

  1. I am so sorry you are in this position. But good on you for doing what you have done so far. Seems like you have done a wonderful job but now it is time for someone else to step up so hoping they do.

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